Collective trauma is exhausting.
One definition of trauma is simply defined as “When you are in fear for your emotional and/or physical safety and/or the safety of someone you love (could be a pet) and you are helpless”.
It is the combo of fear and helpless that creates trauma. Based on this definition you can see that, yep, we as a whole and individually are experiencing trauma. In fact we are experiencing what is called “sustained trauma.” Some of us might even be additionally experiencing “secondary trauma” but for now I will just explain sustained trauma.
In our beginnings as humans, “cave man time”, we were meant to experience trauma but only for moments — not sustained trauma. Our internal responses to trauma were prepared to deal with an event, such a saber tooth tiger threatening us, and then the trauma stopped, the tiger backed off and we carried on with our internal chemical response returning to baseline. Threat = response = back to normal.
Yet, sustained trauma, such as a pandemic or abuse is NOT something we were meant to handle — either physiologically or psychically. Again, the ramifications of sustained trauma are meaningful in understanding what is going on with us.
When trauma occurs our brain sends out chemicals to help us respond to the threat. That’s great. However, with sustained trauma the chemicals are released but never drop back to baseline, because, simply, the trauma/threat is still there. We were wired to have trauma but not sustained. And we were wired to have a release of chemicals, but not continuous. Because we were not wired to handle this sustained release of chemicals, there are some consequences that happen internally which are relevant to the pandemic we are all experiencing.
When the chemicals stay heightened, because the threat persists, we become tired. Even with less to do and more sleep, fatigue can set in. It is a lot that our bodies and nervous systems are managing! We can become tired and not able to fall or stay asleep. We can space out or have trouble concentrating. We can be irritable. We can just feel unbalanced. Again sustained trauma is a whole heck of a lot for our system to manage! Perhaps it could be understood metaphorically as having your foot on the gas peddle without release.
One of the things that those of us who have worked with sustained trauma (abuse, war………) is that when your chemicals remain in an elevated state you become less able to sense threat or danger. It is why victims of trauma often are re-traumatized again and again. So, be extra attentive in everyday life and know that you may experience carelessness in keeping yourself safe as a result of sustained trauma.
If you have experienced past trauma, most of us have, and not been treated by a professional, it is possible that the feelings of current fear and helplessness can be compounded by leftover feelings from previous trauma.
There are many things to be read/watched/listened to about trauma. Some experts to check out are Peter Levine, Dan Siegal, Bessel van der Kolk, Bruce Perry.
If I could leave you with any “advice” it would be to be extra kind and gentle with yourself. Do not expect yourself to be preforming as usual. Be attentive to the amount of alcohol/weed/sugar you are taking in. Let yourself feel. If it is tears go ahead. It will pass and super important not to shut down, as that just asks your body and psyche to work harder. This is hard enough. Don’t be another thing you have to fight.
Do not underestimate how traumatic this time is. Whether you have experienced trauma before or not, you have now! A group none of us never wanted to join and yet, take some comfort that you’re not alone. That is meaningful. You are human and this is a big deal.